A Secret in the Dark
by isis whit
Summary: A little follow up to Home and Surprises. It's SBR, but you gotta read to find out more...


A Secret in the Dark Disclaimer: Profiler and its characters belong to Cynthia Saunders, Sander/Moses Productions, Three Putt Productions, and (still?) to NBC, but I have adopted them. In my heart, they are mine! 

Rating: PG 

Classification: SBR 

Author's Note: The story is set some time after "Home" and "Surprises". Sam and Bailey are together. 

**A Secret in the Dark**

By isis_whit 

"Agent Malone, we've found a body." 

A body, he thought. She can't be dead, she just can't. He approached the crime scene. Somebody lifted the yellow police line. He felt numb, he didn't even feel the searing pain in his shoulder. Somebody pushed down the plastic cover from her face. She lay on the ground, her eyes closed, just as if she was sleeping. A single, red rose was placed on her chest. Bailey squatted. Slowly, he stretched his left hand out. He didn't dare to touch her, afraid that if he did, everything would become real. He didn't want it to be real. He couldn't touch her, yet his hand moved unwillingly closer to her still form. His fingers were trembling as he touched the cold skin of her wrist. She can't be dead! No! 

He woke up with a start, his heart racing so fast that his chest felt like it was bursting. He turned over and carefully touched the spot in the bed right beside him. She was sound asleep. He sighed deeply as he felt her breathing evenly under his hand. Carefully, he got up and tiptoed into the bathroom. He switched on the lights. 

This was reality. She was in the room next door, safe and well. That's what he kept telling himself. Yet, this nightmare didn't want to go away. He had never told her about it, never told her that in his dreams, he saw her lying on the ground, dead, a single red rose placed on her chest. Night after night. It felt so real. Her face looked so peaceful, just like she was sleeping. 

He pulled the sweat-soaked T-shirt over his head. His body ached. A shower might help but he didn't want to wake her up, so he just let some cold water run over his face and neck. His heart didn't want to slow down. Everything was fine now. She was safe, and they were together now. Why couldn't he forget everything and live happily ever after? 

He switched off the lights and sat down on the bathtub. He longed for oblivion. A few minutes, he told himself. A few minutes and he'll get himself together again. Then he'd just lay down again and sleep. 

He got up and felt like he had gotten kicked in the stomach as a wave of nausea climbed up his spine. He swore and stumbled to the toilet. He threw up until his ribs felt sore. He flushed and tried to suppress the dry heaves that were still coming. Cold all of a sudden, he shivered. Then he washed his face, brushed his teeth, and stepped back into the bedroom. In the darkness, she lay on her side, her back turned to his side of the bed. Thank God he didn't wake her, he thought. 

Exhausted, he slid under the covers and shivered. He needed to touch her. Carefully, he snuggled up to her. He felt her back against his bare chest. He closed his eyes and drew in the smell of her hair. He buried his face in it and sighed deeply. He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her closer, trying to envelop her in his body, overcome by the need to protect her. 

She groaned softly and turned in his arms. He loosened his grip. She faced him, her eyes were gazing at him in the darkness. Slowly, she cupped his cheek in her hand and stroked his face with her thumb. 

"What's wrong?" she whispered. 

"Nothing," he said with a sad smile. "Sorry I woke you up." 

Softly, she placed one hand over his heart and caressed his face with the other. She felt a tear trickle over the back of her head. She pulled his face down on her chest and wrapped the blanket tighter around both of them. She held him in his arms. Eventually, he calmed down a little. 

"You awake?" she whispered softly. 

"Yeah." 

"Don't you think it's time for us to talk?" 

He stiffened in her arms but didn't answer. 

"Bailey?" 

"I'm okay, Sam. Just an upset stomach." 

"Okay," she said. "And what was it last night? And the night before? And the night before that?" 

He sighed. 

"Bailey, did you think I wouldn't notice that you wake up every night?" 

"Sorry, Sam. I didn't know I woke you up. Maybe I should move back to the guest room." 

She held him back as he tried to pull away. 

"Please, don't run. I love having you here with me. I love you! But I can't watch this any longer. Please," she begged. 

He struggled. A part of him wanted to share his troubled feelings with the woman he loved and who loved him. The other part wanted to protect her from the dark corners of his mind, from his secret fears, from everything she had seen too many times in her life before. He felt trapped. He kissed her lips tenderly and rested his head against her shoulder. 

"Sam, I... I keep having this dreams." 

Sam was relieved. At least he was talking. It was a start. 

"I don't want to scare you, Sam, but I can't seem to help it." 

"You know, nightmares aren't so real if you tell somebody about them." 

He laughed. 

"What's funny?" 

"That's exactly what Frances told me once." He kept quiet for a long time. "I can't lose you," he whispered. 

"I'm here, Bailey. I'm here. Jack can't hurt us anymore. He has no power over our lives any longer." 

"I wish that were true," he sighed. "I loved you for such a long time, and I still can't believe that now you're finally with me. It's all I ever wished for. I don't know why I just can't put all this behind me." 

Sam kissed his head. "Please, talk to me. I'm here for you, don't push me away." When he didn't reply, she continued, "We can get through this together, I know that." 

He swallowed hard. "I don't know what to do," he whispered. 

She cradled his head and rocked him softly. "I love you, Bailey. Let me help you." 

"Give me some time, okay? Bear with me a little longer. Would you do that for me, Sam?" 

"I'll do anything for you. I love you more every day, Bailey Malone." 

He looked up and his lip brushed over her jaw softly. He took her face in his hands and kissed her. "You're my salvation, Sam. I'd be lost without you." 

Sam kissed him back, kissed away the doubts, the fears. She looked into his eyes and saw a little smile on his face. She kissed his eyes and with her lips close to his ear, she whispered, "Sleep now, my darling. I'm yours forever." 

**THE END**   
  
Copyright © 2001 by [isis_whit][1]

  
  


   [1]: mailto:isis_whit@yahoo.de



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